I'm 25.

I'm a quarter-of-a-century old, and I never thought I'd see the day I'd reach this age. I was only 15 then, thinking 25 was too far and those with that age were too old. Look at me now, wrinkles around my eyes and my body laden with unwanted subcutaneous fats, but then I'm happy. :) I used to not want to talk about my age especially around the younger ones because that made me feel old, and then I thought to myself: Where's the beauty and grace in ageing when I refuse to acknowledge it? They say life begins when you're 40, and I'm nowhere near that so that doesn't really make me old. ;)

Looking back to the year that has been, I am very thankful for the blessings given to me, the wonderful people around me, the lessons I've learned, and the wisdom I've acquired. Those people that greeted me (even without Facebook reminding them) made me feel so grateful. I was overwhelmed with greetings and well wishes. I must have done something right to deserve all the love I'm receiving.

There are still so many things I'd like to improve on. I'm keeping a mental note on those so the next time I turn 26, I'd tell myself I've gone a long way. :)

I Miss High School

I love these people to the moon and back!!! <3

The shooting of 27 innocent children and adults in Connecticut must have been the most devastating news for the year. I have been drowning my computer screen with information and testimonials from those present during the shootout since the time the news broke out, and I still can't help but shed some tears. I am so blessed to be alive. It could have happened to me. It could have happened to my equally innocent little nephew or cousins. That could have been my hometown. But alas, it was not, and what better eyeopener to remind me to thank God for another day.

My heart goes out to every innocent children, mother, and teacher killed. The suspect still deserves attention AND our forgiveness. We owe him that despite everything that has happened. He may, after all, also be a victim. Even Jesus said, "My Lord, forgive them for they do not know what they are doing." Who are we then to deny him that?

Let's say our prayers of thanks and eternal repose of their souls. There are a lot of things to be thankful for, as there are also a lot of things to be sorry for. Let's start making a list, maybe then we'd see how very blessed we are.

RHB

I really don't know where I stand in the very controversial RH Bill. While in mass a while ago, the priest said people cannot be indecisive. It is either I'm with it or against it. It's really hard, especially because the second reading has already been passed. One more and it's over; the majority has spoken.

What I am pretty sure is that I just want a better life for me and my fellow Filipinos. If there are parents with eight, nine, or more children, with blue-collar jobs and living in the slums, HOW ELSE WILL THEY BE ABLE TO PROVIDE FOOD AND EDUCATION FOR ALL THEIR CHILDREN? That is always the biggest question. And there is also a solution to that, I know. Family planning may count as one. It is very hypocrite then for others to say that it doesn't solve anything. But to say that it is the number one and most effective way is also very shady when there's good governance, increase in employment and wages, or better access to health care and education for all citizens, especially the youth. I wish those with power would realize that. It gets really depressing to see them decide on something where there are more vital issues to focus on, but I am also not saying it is of any less importance.

When you live in a country like mine, national issue like this becomes extra personal for most. They shove their beliefs upon every person's throat they meet, as if their opinions are the only thing that matter. When you express your thoughts, they disregard them and start to babble about their own. It's crazy!
Your thoughts?

100 Years :)

Hello!

I can't believe it's been over a year since I've last seen my high school friends! It's starting to actually sound ridiculous for we live in one country, but has never found the time to hang out with each other. My friends, that is possible. I'm so glad I finally took this long vacation. Seeing old (likewise new) faces brings a lot of fun memories.

The friends I've made in high school are the people I've missed the most. High school was the best! I see one friend and remember how we've used to laugh together or cram after lunch because of an upcoming Trigonometry quiz. I see another and remember sharing stories in a big field just at the back of our school over green mangoes and salt. I see a group and remember how we were so tempted to skip our cleaning errands after class so we could hang with the others and talk about the day. Last night, over starry sky and a quiet space away from the crowd, we reminisced about the days that's been. We had our favorite and least favorite teachers and how their subjects affected us. Practical Arts, Algebra, Trigonometry were among the worst subject we don't seem to get amidst our efforts. We talked about people, places, and ideas. So much has changed. I was even asked to pay for a "guest fee" for our school's centennial celebration. It was crazy! I've been with the same school since my preparatory days until the last four years of my high school. I am now back to being a tourist at a place I once called my only home.

For the few remaining days I have in town, I plan to get back to my roots and reconnect with friends and family. I cannot wait to see everyone. Thank You, Lord, for this wonderful chance. :)

An Ocean of Hope

I remembered my Singapore trip with college friends last 2010. It was the best. We were all thrilled. We didn't sleep  on our first night there. We kept creeping out of our room to eat and dance around the hallway. We were trying not to laugh too hard. We were giddy because we were actually together on an out-of-town getaway. I tell you I would have framed that moment if I could. I would have time frozen and then bask again in the happiness it brought.

The following day we went to visit a nearby cloister with nuns busily going about their daily routine. We were met by the head of the congregation as we came with religious persons. She was clad in pink all over, save her face. She had a high nose and a pretty mouth, especially when she talks. She had a certain aura that exudes gentleness. We gathered around in a circle while she was trying to get to know each and every one of us. You could say that was really nice of her, especially when she was coaxing us to heed the "calling" and come join the religious life (insert blank look). Herein lies the story.

She was 14 when she first visited a monastery. She was so sure she wanted to become a nun then. She told the superior of her intention and was told to come back again after high school. You are too young, my child, she said. High school came and another visit meant a futile attempt into cajoling the superior. Are you sure? You have to think about it, she said once more. Four years went by and the calling became even more persistent. Of course the parents had to be in the picture. Being the only heir from a family whose business is textile and international trade, they just had to be. She was trained quite intensively for she would one day take over the family business. She was sent to travel to most parts of the world for both business and pleasure. Suitors, expensive gifts, words of flattery and what have you soon came flocking. I still felt empty. And there's that voice, she said. Finally while in town for a short stay, she was invited to a daytime cruise with friends. I had my gold bracelet, an heirloom from my grandparents. It was so special to me and by accident, I dropped it in the middle of the ocean, she told us. She asked God to help her find it, even to the point of making it a sure sign of entering the congregation if it will be found. I was so sad. But while frolicking in the beach and playing with the sand, lo and behold, the bracelet was in my hand, just before the sun set, she narrated. The rest, they say, is history.

I have goosebumps as I type, and I still get them no matter the many times I've shared this piece. Dropped in the middle of the ocean and found on the sand thereafter?! Seriously?! Who can ever do that?! Only the most powerful, omnipotent, and all loving God... Tonight, I needed a little pat in the back. Tough times like these when hormones are raging, I think aloud this story. I have been looking forward to my most awaited vacation. Guess what? I woke up five minutes earlier than my scheduled flying time. I wanted to kill myself. How could I not hear the alarm?! Why did it had to happen? Then I stop and think, there must be a reason. And then I let God take full control. I don't really have any words of wisdom to share as what the sister narrated, but what I know is that whatever we're experiencing, He has willed it. :)

My fifteen-day vacation will soon commence. I have never been this excited to go home to my hometown. I will finally be seeing my family and high school friends again. Plus, I will be eating all the food I've missed. I cannot wait! :)

Ahhh, always double the fun!

Live Frugal

I've always been very frugal, almost always to a fault. I scrimp on most things save the essentials. I like it that way. Most times, people give me odd looks because how and why I do it bother them. I don't have a problem with it, hence I do not get why it should also be a problem to anyone. I find extreme pride in the fact that when I want something so bad, I could get it no matter how long it takes, because I save up for it. I hear people say, that's too expensive, or, it's impossible. Being a nurse means having a meager pay. I chose this and any complaints about my salary would mean a question in my professional decision. And I would not want that because it will not do me any good.

So in tough times like these, I switch on my frugal mode. It's exciting to see how I come up with money to spend on my travel, leisure, and wants. Just last night, I did myself a favor. I bought a set of books because I've been wanting to own it for the longest time. It felt so good. I thought to myself, hey you've come a long way from being a scrimp master to a I-feel-like-I-should-do-some-self-spending. :)

From my little nook...

Small things that I am grateful for:

1. 15 hours of undisturbed sleep

 - I had a very tiring schedule. After six days of work, I finally had a rest day. I went home around 4 in the afternoon yesterday and went straight to bed after washing my body. I didn't even have my dinner. I woke up at 10:30 in the morning today. I would've slept more, but decided I had more than enough. :) Sleep is essential. It is a luxury not everyone can have.

2. songs that make you smile

 - When I listen to Lady Gaga's Pokerface, I am reminded of that very fun night in college. I was on a duty, along with my classmates. We were all sleepy. We played this song and made impromptu dance steps to go with it. We were laughing so hard! Looking back, that song was indeed one of the soundtracks of our lives. I would give anything to have that night back.

3. text messages from my mother

 - It is a known fact that I lived away from my parents for the last seven years. Although they try to fly here as regularly as they can, seeing them everyday is so much different. I would love to feel the warmth of my mother's touch when I'm sick. I would love to hear her nag when I'm being extra pushy. I would love to have her around when I go home from work/school. So text messages from her are always highly regarded. :)

4. biblical quotes

- This is one of my favorite quotes from The Bible: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

It says it all. God is good all the time. He will provide for all our necessities. :)

I've heard and seen series of unfortunate incidents, not of mine personally but to several people I am close to or acquainted with, tonight and the past week. When I heard these gruesome stories, I told to myself, 'I may consider not giving birth if this is the kind of world my child will live in.' Seriously, the world has gone mad! Who would shoot someone in broad daylight? Whatever the reason, it is and will never be justifiable. That man was a father, a husband, a son, a brother, and a friend to so many. He had a dream. He had a family. He was young and innocent. He was just out to go to work. Why? :(

There is also that lonely face of hopelessness that persists to come out when times  are tough and our strength is sapped. When you see a dear friend lying semi-conscious in a hospital bed fighting to survive another day, the feeling of despair rubs off on you. I felt that more so tonight. I know I had no right to question and the best that I could do was to hold back those tears and smile my most genuine smile.
The odds are not in our favor, but pretty soon, the wind shall change its course. Today she's down here, tomorrow she will be up there. Lord, I know You. You never fail those who come to You for help. :)

Everyday, the moment I wake up, I say out a prayer and a reminder to myself to be good, say good, do good. I have been constantly trying to better myself. I think you could say that I'm old enough to know what's right and wrong. It doesn't take a very smart woman to figure that out.

I meet different kinds of people at work. The valuable lessons they teach me is immensely rich and helpful. What I learn from them I always try to apply to my personal and social well-being. Always trying being the keywords. A dear coworker (and I didn't even see him a friend back then) told me yesterday, I don't measure people by his intelligence or material wealth. There's really more to all those. And he could have never said anything wiser than that. It matters to me too that he told me something confidential, saying I know you can keep a secret. Words like these mean a lot to me, it's as if I need a validation that I've been a good person, after all.

I've been working on things lately. And anytime you feel like I'm breaking up, please feel free to reprimand me. :)

1. No lying

Sometimes, it comes off very easily to all of us to say a little white lie here and there, or when the situation warrants. We tell reasons from another to excuse ourselves that we are indeed just telling the truth. I do that, too. But I've come to realized how there is so much truth in the saying honesty is the best policy. I try so hard to say the truth as it is; no lies concealed. So the next time someone asks me something, I say it like black and white are the only options, no gray areas included.

2. Not to speak badly/negatively of others

This one is so hard, trust me. I feel bad every time I find myself doing it. My conscience doesn't let me have a good night's sleep. :/ I know we all do it, intentionally or not. There comes a point when we feel it's obligatory to warn others of a person's ill nature. We think that's alright, I had to alert/caution him. But it's wrong. We can never justify saying something bad against a person, no matter our reasons. I'm trying to master the art of shutting my mouth when I don't have anything nice to say. If they think you dress sloppily, you will never hear it from me.

We all have to work ourselves into being the best person we can possibly be. My days are numbered and my skin is aging, I wouldn't want to wait for another time to do it. So help me God. :)

I've been staring at this blinking cursor on my screen for a long time now. I've had so many thoughts last night before sleep consumed me, and I said to myself, "Time to write them all down...", but I find myself experiencing writer's block as I type. It's a shame, really, but it won't get the better of me.

I've had a very good laugh with my coworkers last night. We went out after an extremely busy shift at work. We all thought we deserved it. Pizza and milk tea are always a good combination. While I have been trying so hard to put my saving skills on a front gear, I also feel like spending a little will do me some good. I had to remind it to myself, time and again. :)

I really have nothing special or whatnot to rant or share about. It's just that I feel incredibly blessed with all the things happening to me. I have a stable job, even with a meager pay, and I get to work with funny friends, too. It's an added plus that I get to go home to two beautiful sisters, who put me on a pedestal anytime I feel like my day is headed for the worse. Let me not forget to give credit to my family back home who loves me so much. I blush. ^o___o^

Good Lord, You are amazing!!! :)

I'm on a High!!! :p

I feel weirdly elated today! This is madness!!! I cannot even wipe this smile off my face. It may either be attributed to the very wonderful fact that I will be finally off from work later, and I need not wake up too early for I have a later call time the next day or maybe the sweet corn I had for breakfast was so delicious I had to remind myself that I should eat like a queen. Amaytheen!! :p
Ta-ta, off to bed I go now... *hey Tin, pleaassseeee, stop grinning!!! 

Happy First

Please let me not forget to write down my thoughts because I seem to have been stuck in the land of neglect and disregard. I know I would have written had I had so much time in my hands. But the thing is, hospital duty sucks the life out of me. I would sleep twelve hours EVERY DAY if I had that chance. :/
Last night was easy-breezy at work, despite our numerous patients' admissions. The number one contributing factor is the people I work with. They're funny and loud! Every night, we share stories of life, realizations, jokes, and whatnot. I find myself amused and so engrossed I forget to prepare the patients' medications. It's crazy!
And every day, when the clock strikes 4:30 in the morning, I take a walk inside the hospital and look out over the nearest window. I may see buildings after buildings ahead of me, but that tiny crack of dawn symbolizes another new beginning and there's an overwhelming feeling inside of me. It's a good kind of feeling, almost surreal to be living out another day to chase my dreams. :)
Almighty Father, You are amazing and eternally kind! :)

Don't Judge Me, Please :)

I've never been a fan of self-documentary movies, especially those released in theaters. I find it an absolute waste of my money. But so much so has been said about these type of movies that I feel I'm being very judgmental about them.

Night shift duty-- awake at night, asleep at day-- has done a great deal as to changing my perception since I 'm able to catch reruns of just about any show featured at HBO or Star Movies. First, there was Justin Bieber's Never Say Never. He is obviously the number 1 popular teenage singing sensation of today's generation. Everybody loves him, even my four-year-old nephew! You have to own that fact. I used to never like him, but his songs were catchy and man can you sing to its tune all day! ;)

His documentary was heartwarming, I tell you. I found myself crying more than twice. His passion and perseverance was something I would want to emulate. He has the talent, but it can only take you as far as where you would want them be. I say he has the talent + patience + dedication. His was a faith unyielding and believing. :) No wonder my sister, and the whole world, adores him.

Next up is Katy Perry's Part of Me. Heavens, this woman is phenomenal! There is no stopping her! She shines ever so bright! :) After watching her music documentary, I see her in a different light. I love every bit of her. It's admiring how she has managed to work everything-- career and personal life. But every good story has to come to an end. :/

Her undying and unwavering commitment to her craft is amazing! The number of fans present in all the cities she's performed in her World Tour is a testament to that. While watching her documentary, sitting beside my sister, we found ourselves shedding tears several times. This is a documentary for those who want to be inspired. It's a personal look on the life of an ordinary girl turned superstar. :)

I may not be necessarily a fan of their music but I have to say I've been a fan of their personality. No one loves a fake. :)

BMT

You know what they say about the friends you made in college? They are the ones who's going to stick with you through the good and the bad times. And this I concur time and again. :) We may have been very busy with our personal lives, but when we do see each other, the day is never enough to catch up on all the lost times.

We have finally found the time to go on a short and quick trip. We have been wanting to go to Sumilon island, located at the southern tip of Cebu, and we finally did it. :) Boy were we glad! :p
I'll be the first to tell you that I'm not a fan of sea and road trips, especially those long and winding. You can be sure I have three or four plastics with me when the visitor arrives. My friends Tiny and Matet have been trying really hard to keep their laughter to themselves while I belched (to think they knew my dilemma even when we were in college). They even faked concern where it warrants. It was so funny I wished someone took a picture of us!

*I had a hard time convincing these two to come and swim in the pool and beach with me, soon as we changed into our swimming attires. They had other pressing matters to attend to. I was so irritated beyond words, I just gawked at them while their imprtant stuff were being done. :/ I hope they read this and remember that time! :p

*When we were snorkeling, I saw the prettiest shade of blue on an equally pretty fish! It's perpetually on my mind. The schools of fish were so beautiful!!! :)

*We kept wishing we had a buffet lunch, which they serve when there are 20+ visitors or on weekends, instead of the plated lunch. We kept joshing the staff to let us have an early lunch or to give us an additional serving. I'll give the food a 3/5 rating only because the pumpkin soup was so good! Their welcome drinks was an absolute refresher, or were we too thirsty from the long trip?

Bukid

Work has been really busy lately, but life is still very good. There are so many things to be thankful for. When I'm swamped with doctors' orders and I feel overwhelmed, I remember good days to get me by. :)

*We woke up to this sight. I had been staring at it for more than an hour.

*The road was long and bumpy. The air was cool. It gets even cooler as we near our destination. 

*What did they say again? That height is might?  I concur.

*Yani would have been very happy to see these. She's fond of flowers. Very pretty!

*We conquered Asia's longest zipline! We were suspended on thin air!

*Del Monte actually houses its employees free of charge. Of course, they'd have to move out when they've retired, so another family may also reside the house.

*Tough roads require a tough driver! :p